The New Year started out good, but unfortunately on the 7th of January my Mom passed away. I thank God, he allowed my Mom to live 85 years. She lived a blessed life. She was a woman full of love, compassion, outspoken with her words and full of wisdom. Although my Mom tried to prepare our family for her death, I was not ready for her to leave. Here is how this death process begin, June 30, 2013, a Sunday afternoon, Mom had my youngest sister to call family members and tell them that she was dying. At that time my husband and I were planning a trip to the beach, but decided to change our plans after Mom ask for us to come home. We drove from Texas to Georgia for the 4th of July holidays. We visited Mom for a few day, but returned back home.
Rapidly throughout the months my Mom’s health declined. By the time my husband and I revisited her for Thanksgiving, she was sleeping a lot and her dementia had gotten worst. Finally on January 7th a little after 10am eastern standard time, my Mom made her transition. I do not think there is anything that can prepare a family mentally to lose someone they love so dear. There is a part of life where you are unrealistic within yourself and wishing that your love one would live forever. However, reality settles in and we are snapped back to living the real life and realize living on earth is not a forever contract.
I have been spending a lot of time thinking about her, looking at her pictures and journaling my thoughts. Journaling is helping me with the grieving process and has been therapeutic. One of the things I am most thankful for throughout this process, my mom had the wisdom and intuition to know she was dying. In a sense, it gave me time to prepare for it and also it gave our family time to say goodbye. I have always been the type of person to journal my thoughts. Therefore, journaling my thoughts about my Mom daily has been my way of cleansing my soul. I write a lot about the kind of woman my Mom was. I also write a lot about my feelings. I write a lot of prayers and affirmations to help strengthen me during this process.
Today I went thrift store shopping, I found a journal for 50cent. It is called a Poetic Earth Journal. I looked it up on the internet. It is a pricey, but absolutely beautiful journal. The price on the internet is $50. However instead of paying $50 for it I bought it for 50 cents. I plan to use my new journal to write my thoughts, affirmations, quotes and prayers.
This whole process has help me draw closer to God. Although, I have always read my bible, now I am reading my bible a lot more throughout the day and doing a deeper studying in the word of God to help comfort me and to help me grow spiritually. I plan to continue to journal my thoughts and prayers to help me through my grieving process. I know I will never ever get over my mom, but I believe I will learn to deal with her death. In the meantime, my journal is my companion to help me through the process. How do you handle grief? What are some things you do to help you through the process?